(This is one of the few times..when i’ve written the title before the post..usually its the other way round. Lets see if i manage to stick to the topic of the title )
Today someone gave me an honest dose of criticism over something i was working on. Not the blunt kinds..but the genuine one..with the rights and wrongs being pointed out, in a neutral way.( And before u jump to conclusions i was NOT cooking another dish in the kitchen). Ok i admit i had asked for feedback, but i had not prepared myself for my own reaction..i was kinda prepared for few things wrong..or that might not go well withthe other person.. (i know, nobody can really do that…and its quite obvious that you react only after the feedback)
My first reactions were- shock, anger, disbelief, pain.
I was hurt for some time..about 15 minutes. i Just turned away from "the zone" I tried to distract myself..by talking around..but the matter kept swinging in my thoughts..i was thinking of new ways to do the same thing..was trying to focus on the pointers that were thrown at me. After a few minutes..i realised..tring to cool off- hey maybe that person Is right..let me try a new way/ a diff perspective/ a diff idea..afterall i believe in trying out diff ways and a bit of experimentation/playing around works Best..and brings out the best too!
So i tried cheering up..started working again..with a somewhat changed attitude..still nursing a bit of THE "pAIN" I felt (which btw seems to have vanished now…cause i was tied up with a Lot of other things) And now my attitude is quite diff- its more like- hey i tried, it didn’t work out, so i’ll try again, this time better, with a bit of feedback..i know what the other person wants..and I’ll do it better now..I’ll work harder.
So lets see how it goes.
Incident got me thinking…
Why the hell can’t everyone take critisism positively..it could work out well..i guess!
Why does criticism hurt so much, even if we Do not want to get affected?
How can we not let criticism affect us..how can we work on it..? (today was my lucky day..but most of the times it isn’t) The normal reaction is to go on a defensive mode. I did that too… (mY exact words were- f****** i worked so hard and you’re saying this?/ u have a problem with that/ you want me to do this? )
So how do u guys handle criticism..this was a recent dose for me..i can’t rememebr the old ones..though there are MANY (yeah another thing..i seem to forget half the things..any ideas for having a good memory anyone??..bahh!)